It seems my go has a formula that never seems to fail: two steps forward, one step back. I feel as I've realized something, only my realization is that I don't understand anything.
Life is the same.
However, everything has seemed much clearer as of late. Instead of staring into vast nothingness, I can see glimmers of light poking through, both in go and my life.
My lack of updates is of course to be expected, having started a new working career at a supermarket. Everything has gone extremely well: after four weeks I was given my first raise - a paltry $0.25, but a raise nonetheless - and am currently being considered for a promotion. I've never been so happy.
But with highs, there must always be lows.
Now I've begun to contemplate what it is I want to do and what it is I have to do. With school rearing it's ugly head, and school payments rearing an even more petrifying figure, I've come to a crossroads: what will I be doing in nine months?
I'm, cross your fingers, graduating in May next year. I will have a degree, but my plan was to not have a simple associates degree. I was planning to transfer and move on to greener pastures; earn a bachelor's at a four-year school and begin my real working life then.
Now I'm considering whether or not I want to do that at all.
I love writing, obviously, and of course I want to pursue it as a lifegiver and a lifebringer, but I am being offered a great opportunity by a first-rate company who have been known to give back to their community.
Perhaps I'm overthinking. I have a knack of recalculating every step of the way - the same on the goban. If I hane here, it's the difference of one point, but I'm behind by three. Do I take the risk?
Well, do I?...
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In other news, I visited the Fort Lee Baduk salon for the first time since I began working. I was glad to see some familiar faces. There's a player I play on two stones who I haven't beaten yet (two games, lost the first by nine points and the second (today) by five). I played a new face I hadn't seen before on four stones and won comfortably. I also played Master Song and won quite handily by twenty points, my largest margin of victory against him. Perhaps I can convince him to let me put down only six next time...
